Saturday, July 28, 2012

A Salute To Those Who Compete

An Inspiration To Mankind

To those who cleanly compete in the great Games, whose talents are manifest and assets made obvious for a wondering world: Before Nine salutes you!

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Please feel free to thrill all humankind with the brilliance and importance of You. And forgo all civility (especially the passive-aggressive sort, aggression masquerading as mildness) . . . you are, after all, anonymous.

But, consider: Dogs have short attention spans, don't tolerate bullies, and we're notoriously thin-skinned -- so make sense, be brief, and play nice, or I'll bite you and pee on your leg. Bark Bark Bark Bark Bark Bark.