Wednesday, July 27, 2016



Go Ahead, Tubbo.

MVOHC:  Did you watch the Democratic convention?
DOG:  No.
MVOHC:  You watch the Republicans, but not your own party?
DOG:  I'm not a Democrat, ______. You know I'm not.
MVOHC:  But this is historic. A woman is being nominated for president!
DOG:  Uh-huh.
MVOHC:  You -- are just a hater.
DOG:  I watched it for five minutes, literally. I saw Al Franken burble about She enough to make me never want to watch him do anything again, ever. I'll watch Sarah Silverman because she's hot. Politically deluded in a profound way; but, hot.
MVOHC:  Je-sus. What do you want in this election? What?
DOG:  I want what everyone in America wants: Buy a five-pound bag of Oreos -- take it into a dark room; close the door, throw a blanket over me; assume the fetal position, and eat until I pass out.
MVOHC: I don't want that.
DOG: Oh, sure you do, one way or another. I'm just not willing to fool myself into believing that my desire for Stimulation and Satiety is really about some higher altruistic principle. I like my hypocrisy without a water-back, thanks.
MVOHC: Good luck with that.


  1. i have been a hillary hater, regarding her as devious and deceitful

    - but after watching the last night of the convention i finally had an instant karma moment - i recognized her as my sister and realized that i could trust her - trust her to do her best, according her own lights

    - while still knowing that i cannot trust her to do what i think would be best, or to tell the truth, or to refrain from what i would consider to be unnecessary mass murder, or in any way to dissent from the consensus of the military-industrial-congressional-financial-corporate media complex -

    may the creative forces of the universe have mercy on our souls, if any


Please feel free to thrill all humankind with the brilliance and importance of You. And forgo all civility (especially the passive-aggressive sort, aggression masquerading as mildness) . . . you are, after all, anonymous.

But, consider: Dogs have short attention spans, don't tolerate bullies, and we're notoriously thin-skinned -- so make sense, be brief, and play nice, or I'll bite you and pee on your leg. Bark Bark Bark Bark Bark Bark.