Friday, August 19, 2011


Take A Badger Break

I Am Not Weasel: The American Badger Works Hard, Plays Hard

American Badger, Oxbow Zollman Zoo (Hoo Hoo; Look At This Cute Little Guy! Photo: Wikimedia)

I humbly invite Grand TurtleBear Bachmann and Monsieur Le Governor Perry to [redacted]; meanwhile, the rest of us can gaze upon the majesty that is The American Badger. Cute, Stylish; protected by the Bern Convention, and takes no crap from anyone.
Badgers can be fierce animals and will protect themselves and their young at all costs. Badgers are capable of fighting off much larger animals such as wolves and bears. Badgers can run or gallop at up to [20 miles] per hour for short periods of time.
The correct term for a group of these cute little guys is A Cete Of Badgers, and an associated group of them is called a Clan.

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Please feel free to thrill all humankind with the brilliance and importance of You. And forgo all civility (especially the passive-aggressive sort, aggression masquerading as mildness) . . . you are, after all, anonymous.

But, consider: Dogs have short attention spans, don't tolerate bullies, and we're notoriously thin-skinned -- so make sense, be brief, and play nice, or I'll bite you and pee on your leg. Bark Bark Bark Bark Bark Bark.