Thursday, November 24, 2011

All Hail The Medium Lobster

Because This You Must Know

He Loves Most Of You; The Rest -- Hoo Boy! You Got Big Problems.

Medium Lobster! There is no Lobster but He - the Living, The Self-subsisting, the Eternal. No slumber can seize Him Nor Sleep. His are all things In the heavens and on earth and under the oceans. Who is there that can intercede In His presence except as He permitteth? He knoweth What (appeareth to All as) Before or After or Behind them. Nor shall they compass Aught of His knowledge Except as He willeth. His throne doth extend Over the heavens and the earth, and He feeleth No fatigue in guarding and preserving them, For He is the Most High, The Supreme (in glory). He is Medium Lobster, the One and Only.
-- by Anonymous, at April 02, 2008 10:03 AM

I dreamed he was iridescent red an green an he had frickin' laser beams comin' outta his head. And he smelled like a fish tank.
-- by Laptop Battery, at August 08, 2011 4:12 AM

MEHR:I want to know what Laptop Battery was on at 4:12 in the friggin' morning when he extolled his Big Vision Of The Lobster.

Why? 'Cause I can -- therefore, I am. Wanting to know what's in the mind of commenters about The Medium Lobster is the new standard for an awareness of existence. It is, you'll agree, less obnoxious than fucking over billions of other humans to amass huge amounts of wealth, just to prove to yourself you exist. So just get used to it.

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