This report is based on results drawn from a catalog of 27 statistical databases maintained by the United Nations, which includes 60 million records about the past, present, and future state of the world. Topics include economics, life expectancy, labor levels, poverty, and a lot more.

The results tell us to move to Pitcarin Island -- Population: 67, but they're all related to each other. It's the Pacific Islands version of
Deliverance, except with Tahitian Log Drums instead of banjos. And, instead of a dam creating rising water levels to hide dead Hillbillies, we have rising sea levels due to Global Warming.

* "Y'all listen, now -- get outta here; go home, and don't come back."
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