I'm thinking about closing down this blog.
The reasons behind it are (as always) personal. Like most blogs, I've used this site as a creative outlet: I write and do art when not posting here, and writing and/or doing the occasional Photoshopped picture was a way of keeping my hand in. At no time did I ever kid myself that my goal was to become a "popular" blogger. That I have even four people who occasionally look in to see what's happening is a bonus.
Essentially, my vision of what's happening in my country is dark (not as if my postings haven't made that clear). The deck does seemed stacked in favor of the Few taking as much advantage of The Many as they can; that won't change. There isn't anything active in our society to stand against that. I'm not quite as pessimistic as Dr. Morris Berman, for example, but close -- I don't anticipate anything on the Macro scale but continued deterioration into a new Feudalism. Ergo Hoc; Ergo Propter Hoc.
Below the Macro, our lives are played out. We grow older, and at some point will die. What was it all about? Where did it all come from, what purpose does it all have; what is it for? There is music, children, food and laughter, and frustration and fear. We're affected by the flux and wash of greater forces but have to move forward, one moment at a time, and at street level: This is where life is lived. This isn't "Doctor Zhivago"; at least, not yet.
Acclaim and approval have been huge draws in my life, and I've fallen far short of any half-made goals in pursuit of that. There were (way too many) times when vanity ruled, and I did want to be that Dog who offered sage or funny observations, and was held in esteem by large numbers of people. In truth, I just wanted a small box to get up on and bark from time to time.
I may be doing new writing, and possibly in a new blog... but I think Before Nine's time may be drawing to a close.
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