Because (For Now) Freedom

Early Days

Senator Bernie Sanders

The New Hampshire primary has been won by Senator Bernie Sanders (it's reported to be a 60-38 split), and Trumpolina (35%).  Sanders appears to have taken the state in a near-landslide, across a wide spectrum of voter demographic groups. He was expected to do well in New England, but exceeded the estimates.

In second place to Trumpolina is Dennis Kasich (15.8%) -- someone whose previous numbers have been almost nonexistent. The Senator from The Church Of I Kill You! (11.7%) is third.  Jebby The Inevitable !  and Lil' Markie, The Great White Whale and Ragin' Carly are far behind -- in fact, Gov. Christie and Fiorina's offices have made rumbling noises of "suspending" their campaigns.  The pundits are saying well; South Carolina's primary, next in the lineup, will be where Trumpolina must dance "The Dying Swan" -- because he can't create the kind of broad constituency necessary to win the nomination.  He's a sideshow. Could never win.

And they're saying well, Bernie is, you know -- old -- and he's promising everyone free health care and education, and who takes any of that seriously? ha ha ha. And like Trumpolina, can't overcome the reality of The Good Ol' Boyz with Money who run The Politiki.  Bernie and Donnyboy will Auger In soon, they say.

However, the same pundits have said just that about Trump through last year -- and still, swathed in Ivana's old TuTu, considerably altered, It Dances On -- to the tune of Randy Newman's Davy The Fat Boy (I bet we can / persuade him to do / the famous / Fat Boy Dance for you / give him half a chance /I jus' know you'll like my Fat Boy's dance).

His Dream Come True

But of course, the story the media is chittering over is how much better than expected Bernie Sanders has trounced  Hillary The Inevitable !  Still, the Punditi are saying SHE IS THE ANOINTED ONE, and Bernie is just a sideshow who will be worn down and outspent in the long run; why does he even bother? they mumble. All he'll do is "make it difficult" for Clinton to claim the Tub Of Slaw, and prove that Business As Usual can too also be confused with actual continuity and progress. He's divisive! And delusional. And Old!

 

You're Scaring Me, Ren:  Hillary Gives It Her Best Stimpy-Face

But as I've said, a vote for what appears to be the 'extreme' candidates for the Presidential nomination in both parties is an indicator of something more serious:  people simply don't accept Business As Usual, or politics as usual, any longer.  The details on Left and Right differ (and are important) -- but both sides feel used, ignored, and kicked to the curb by special interests. Wonder why that would be.

The fact that Hillary and Jebby The Inevitables ! pretend this isn't happening is an indicator of how desperately the Good Old Boyz in both major parties want to maintain control. The Punditi will paint Sanders and Trumpola as mean statistical deviations, not even worth mentioning (except to say their campaigns will crash and burn 'any minute now').  We'll see.

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Politiki Note

Eye Oh Way

Election years are when the currents of American society rise and collide in all their noisy, discordant glory; it's particularly true in Presidential campaign years.

A time when every politician in the contest tries to evoke a connection between the electoral process, and the rural-farming, pre-industrial, small-town roots of the nation's past : of torchlight parades; Lincoln and Douglas debating; Teddy and Franklin Roosevelt campaigning from the platform at the back of the last Pullman car in a train that whistlestopped through the heartland.  It's a myth of continuity, of fairness and democracy, an attempt to bind us to an age that disappeared long ago; and it begins with the caucuses in Iowa.

Half of my people are from Iowa -- Muscatine (Pop. 22,000+); Moscow (Pop. 361); Atalissa (Pop. 311). Small places, at the eastern edge of the Great Plains not far west of the Mississippi. And the chances are good that some third cousins, twice removed, are casting their ballots tonight.

Tomorrow, we'll get to see who the winners are. There is a large contingent, left, right and center, that are praying on their knees that this will be the end of Trumpolina. We'll see.

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MEHR, MIT EINE KLEINE SCHADENFREUDE:  The Paper Of Record's headline this morning -- "Cruz Wins In Iowa, Dealing Trump a Humbling Loss".  But in looking at the percentages, it wasn't exactly a crushing rejection of Trumpolina by Iowa's caucusers: 27.6% = Cruz, 24.3% = Trumpy; 23.1% = Lil' Markie. So not yet the singing of O Donny Boy, Da Pipes Da Pipes Is Callin'...

And, please remember that the 'winner' in this nightmarish scenario is Greg Stillson. Greg Stillson, ladies and gentlemen. This is a person who will be ecstatically happy to shove their concept of religion down the throats of every member of American society. It is an evangelical Xtian's sacred duty to do so, and so help bring about whatever crazed, brain-damaged delusional mutant freakshow image of their own private interpretation of selected parts of the Bible the will of god (well, somebody's god, anyway).

As a Repub candidate, I'd take Donny any day. But it all comes down to money. It comes down to whomever Addeled Sheldon, the KochBrudern, Lil' Rupert and a few other HNWIs at home and abroad (remember, offshore contributions, properly sheep-dipped, aren't illegal after the Scalia Court's Citizens United decision!) want to purchase to be that candidate. 

On the Democratic side, ony a few tenths of a percentage point separated Hillary The Inevitable !  from Senator Bernie Sanders: the contest continues into New Hampshire.

And, the press recognizes that this election season, the focus is not "jobs" or "the economy" or "the war(s)"; it's about a fundamental Rage At The Machine. As Michael Barbaro noted in the Paper Of Record:

The vote here in Iowa was a portrait of red-hot America, so disaffected that it turned to a pugilistic evangelical Republican who calls for demolition of a system saturated with corruption. And it sent a forceful message to Democratic leaders that it was unwilling to put aside its resentment of Wall Street and corporate America to crown a lifelong party insider who has amassed millions in speaking fees from the big banks.

Monday night’s results confirmed that despite the widening cultural and political fissures that have divided right and left, voters are united in an impatience, even a revulsion, at what they see as a rigged system that no longer works for them.

For Republicans, the enemy is an overreaching government, strangling their freedoms and pocketbooks. For Democrats, it is an unfair economy, shrinking their paychecks and aspirations.

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At Night They Dream Of Robot Nixon

Reepub Leakin'

Forget Donnyboy. Ignore Crazy Moose Lady and Greg Stillson. Put Randy Paul, Carly Cruella, Big Chris, Little Marky, Jebby !  and the rest of the Thug Boat Rat Pack on the Back Burner.

Real Americans™ respond to two -- and only two -- true candidates for the Republican Presidential nomination: The Zombified Ronald Rayguns, and Robot Nixon.

Real Americans™ want a leader who will Restore America without resorting to laborious steam-cleaning methods, use of smelly chemicals, or compromises with cheese-eating Surrender Monkeys abroad and Fifth Columnists here at home. Or as Crazy Moose Lady said on Monday, “How about the rest of us? Right-winging, bitter-clinging, proud clingers of our guns, our God, and our religion, and our Constitution.”

Yes; Murragh In Cans want a leader who is undead -- or, bound to a robot body so as to stomp our many, many enemies flat.  As the poet says, Well, and then /  funny, ha ha, not funny / but now what they’re doing is wailing / Trump and his Trumpeters / not conservative enough. Zombie Rayguns and Robot Nixon will give Merrycow back its Gravitas and its full-service gas stations, where the Beefalo roam.

 They just know it to be true; so they will be coming, to a Primary state near you:  Vote early, and often.  Any questions, call Fat Karl.  He has The math.  A-roo.

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MEHR, MIT OBLIGATORISCH FOTO, VON NETTISCH KLEINE TIER:

Hoo Hoo Hoo; Es ist Natürlichkeit! Click Here To See More About This Little Guy. 

Don't Forget To Bring Your Personal Injury Attorney. 

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He Rises

Elekshun 2016

More soon to come from the Land Of The Brave and the Home Of Whatever We Are, as the Republikannerfest becomes stiff, nasty, and something that goes Bump In The Night -- and the Zombified Ronnie Rayguns comes once again to eat eat eat lead America out of our Slough Of Despond, once again to reclaim the mantle that is Mickey and the Name That Is Legion.  Arooo.

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Everything But The Headline

Trumpola !

The Republican party continues its descent: In a Reuters / Ipsos poll, 31 per cent of Republicans believe Donny is "the Republican candidate most trusted to manage the economy, deal with foreign leaders and serve as commander in chief."

  

And, more Republicans "would trust him with the nation’s nuclear weapons than most of the rest of their party's presidential primary field."  When asked, these same Republicans believed Elvis may have faked his own death, and that the Occupy! movement was financed by Commie Red Chinese Island-Building Oligarchs. 

"We need someone like Trump to stand up to the Chinese," said Bigelda Hure of Steeltown, Ohio. "It's time to kick butt. We need more narcissistic, sociopathic brinksmanship in our foreign policy. We need leaders who will continue to impoverish the vast majority of Americans for the benefit of 'The Owners'. That's what will make America great again. That, and more megamergers."

Meanwhile, Jebby ! attempted to reignite his flailing campaign. Standing in front of several people and a Superintelligent Parakeet at the parking lot of a Foodway in Tampa, Younger Bush waved away the advice of his critics. "I can't be someone I'm not," he said. "Chang The Mystic Warrior told me to say that." The Parakeet narrowed its eyes at Younger Bush, a sure sign that all is not well and will not be well.

Superintelligent Parakeet: Cute, But Don't Waste His Time. Ever.

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Doldrums Before The Descent

Your Color-Coded Weekend

Most people I know feel uneasy about the future. Climate change; the unending brutality in the Middle East, and the tide of Refugees... heartbreaking, even as it affects the map of internal European politics.

In America, our political landscape resembles more than the usual Pestidental Year struggle -- it's not just between Liberals and Conservatives, but between an honest Populism, Business-As-Usual politicos who Fluff the same Old Order that's paid them for generations; and the Rebels -- Buffoons, our own Xtian Taliban, and Tea Partei Randians.

The Homeland Security Advisory System was created in the wake of Nine-eleven, during the reign of "Lil' Boots" Bush (appointed Pestident by the U.S. Supreme Court in 2000). It was criticized, like the peevish dullard who approved it, as being "vague and ineffective", with alert levels that simply remained either Yellow (Elevated) or Orange (High). 

It was replaced in 2011 by the National Terrorism Advisory System, which does not use color-coding and consists of two stages, "Elevated" or "Imminent".  This was replaced in 2015 by the current color-coded system, based on the "share how you feel" ideas of the current administration.

Given that Fred Thompson is dead, Little Paulie Ryan is Speaker-To-Animals In Da House, Republikanner Candidate Trump !  is in second place to a religious zealot that makes Grand Turtlebear Bachmann look sane (Sehr Aber Schade, Jebby ! ), and Hillary ! allowed herself to be questioned by the Tea Partei in Congress without hurling blood curses against their firstborn in front of the media, we feel we'll need it in the days ahead.

If you don't believe me, above is an unretouched photograph from Australia's Division Of Inland Rooways, advising motorists that for about the next 75 miles, they can encounter Wombats and Kangaroos that are are large as Camels. 

Crikey. That's one serious country. Now, the fact of Lil' Rupert starts to make more sense, mate. I get up in the morning expecting The Weird Stuff to appear, but it isn't often acknowledged in advance by a Road Maintenance department.

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Ad From Days Of Future Past

Faux Ads From that terrible Dog;  Click & enlarge; it's easy and fun !

 

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NEWS -- ON THE MARCH !!

Turn Your Home Into An Arena Of Terror And Shame By Reading This

 

Dateline / Washington: President Boner To Go Away

President John Boner announced yesterday that he is stepping down from his position as Speaker-To-Animals in order to spend more time with his family and his expertly-crafted hairpiece. Upon hearing the news, Boner's family locked him out of his Georgebushtown Double-Wide home and he was forced to spend the night with a sheep, hooker, or kitchen appliance by himself.

Poor Boner. Since the exit of Lil' Eric Cantor, Boner had come under increasing pressure from members of the Amerikanischer Tea Partei who live in his pants to secede from the USA, end Medicare, divert the nation's Social Security funds to Lloyd Blankfein for His amusement, and provide treats to America's deserving wealthy.  Because Freedom. But Boner could not do this -- he could not wear his pants. The Powerbars that Be had a sad, and America didn't care, because Hillary!  Jebby!

Boner had been recently described by some Parteigenossen as "sick, old; his coat was no longer shiny and his nose was warm" -- clear signs, they said, that he should be taken out behind the House Barn and put down -- but humanely, with a shovel, or volume 2 of the House Rules.  Rather than allow himself to be publicly shamed, Boner ran away.

He is gone now. But we should remember his relentlessness, his turgid imbecility and Aspergerish mien withal. Remember how he sat behind the Pestident during the annual STFU Address and the teevee showed him making sour faces and farting into the seat cushion.

He accomplished so little for so many, and allowed the few so much; a Lickspittle Running Dog who cried on command, thought Gustav Klimt was a clothing designer, and who never stopped thinking of the Girl he left in his behind.

 (Britches 'n Cecil / ©2009 Paul Corrigan:  Hey -- We Want More!)

Boner was last seen with Britches and Cecil, thinking of additional, last-minute Crumby Presints he could leave for all of us, on his way Out The Door That Is America -- that's the one spray-painted gold, with that cheesy lamp beside it.

 Dateline / Again Washington: President Mikky To Go Away Too, Also

Righthandy Guy to President Boner, Kevin McCarthy looked as if he was set to become Presidenty himself. But like a becalmed Sturgeon in a reduced-watershed Sacramento Delta, he too failed to find enough Tea Partei to live in his pants. Then, he marched proudly out to expose himself before the Press. Many wanted to look away, but America is a strong place which no deodorant can tame -- so we looked anyway, and it was cheesy, but it was real.

Mikky Tells The Press The Truth About Potomac-Town

McCarthy told everyone that Chopin's Etude No. 3, Op. 10 in E Major, was the equivalent of Proust's  "Remembrance Of Things Past". Many agreed. Many more thought Chopin was a brand of Chinese frozen food, or an ice cream Treat For Our Wealthy.

Then McCarthy told the Press that he had been in Washingtown a long time, and knew the Trooth: Alien beings who felt nothing (because they were Plant Matter), who were birthed from huge seed pods, replaced us while we slept.  "You're next," Mikky said to America with a smile. "I haven't slept in a thousand hours, I don't have the votes, and I need a new face." And then he -- like 2% of the Frog species of the Earth this year -- was gone too.

Dateline / You Know Where: Sad Vlad On Every Corner

Sad Vlad Desperately Seeks Totoro Approval. Think We're Kidding? Maybe. Or, Maybe Not.

Strutting and preening in a way designed to make even the simple Yak desire him -- Sad Vlad, The Putin, Botox Wrestler and All-Around Guy, got the better of everybody, again, by driving his military vehicle into downtown Middle East and parking in a handicapped zone.

The Nato, an all-but extinct creature in Europe, looked on and whinnied or grunted or keened -- you know; that noise that Natos make. Other major countries stood around and watched, fuming, with arms crossed, the very picture of being offended by simply unspeakable rudeness. Well; I never, they huffed.

"That's your fucking problem," Sad Vlad replied as he loaded a crate of Extra Pony-Size Trojan-Ezy into his armored car. "You never. I always."

Many Tea Partei members in that America found themselves curiously aroused by the melding of manliness and Cluster Munitions. If only we could do that, they thought to themselves privately as they watched the Russian BombCam footage on teevee. If Lil' Boots were here, then President Cheney woulda shown that Eye-sis. Guess we'll have to root fer the Russkis!

And Sad Vlad didn't stop there. He was spotted in a submersible, dashed down to Crimea, jetted off to New Ork and told a roomfull of people that Russia was On The March and would Be Great Again, by Soso's Last Underpants!  ('Soso' =  a nickname for 'Joe'; you can fill in the rest if you are licensed to do so.)

Vlad said he was building a new coalition with that Iran, and kicking the indecisive, candyassed Amerikanyets' Middle Eastern foreign policy to the curb. Bizarre Al-Asshat, Killer Dentist of Syria, would be propped up. Screw the Saudis and the UAE and those guys -- they'd come around, or else. He'd put a saddle on a Nato and ride it around, or he wasn't the Leader Of The Fee-Based World. "Take that, John Carey," Sad Vlad bellowed. "My face job is better than your face job!"

Fortunately, Sad Vlad said all this in Russian, without formal translation, and the roomful of people he was speaking to were a busload of tourists from Canada in the Tiki Room of a Holiday Inn in the South Bronx. Vlad's wranglers hustled him back to the big UN building in time for him to address the assembled nations and say more or less the same things. "Come and get me, Coppers!" Vlad growled, then looked up towards the heavens and shouted, "Top Of The World, Babushka!"

Dateline / Murrika: TRUMPOLA !

Be Still, My Weasel. (Photo: David Becker / Reuters)

Donnyboy can no longer control the Weasel Who Lives On His Head. It speaks to him; it purrs. He has listened and repeated whatever it says.  Whatever it has told him to do, he has done. And because the USA likes warm cheese and Amerikan Idle, and everything is now Reality Teevee, the antics of Donnyboy's faux-bling candidacy has fascinated the Americans (but not as much as whatever Sports Franchise Product we are supposed to be watching now).

Citizens understand in their bowels that they have no power. That the Game Is Rigged, in ways which -- if we bothered to read documents on Wikileaks -- would induce vomiting. So life for the powerless becomes theater, "Reality Teevee"; and suddenly the spectacle of politics makes sense: It won't make any difference what we do. We don't choose -- "They" choose.

You buy many things. You toil at jobs. Daily, you consume your own body weight in foods rendered from sugar, whale fat, and abused animals. You text. A lot. You watch teevee. You daydream about Taylor Swift and unconsciously imitate that little hop-step she has perfected. You keep saying It's possible for anyone to become rich in America; we're the land of opportunity. I can win the Lottery. I can make a profit in the Market.

Against that backdrop of rabid hope, a Donnyboy candidacy not only makes sense; it has an odor of inevitability about it (which smells just like the interior of a 1939 Mercedes).  Hell; in these conditions, even a Grand Turtlebear Bachmann candidacy makes sense.

But now, Donnyboy's luster, all Palmolive and Sprinklies from the soda fountain, has begun to soften in the heat. The Weasel is tired, and whispers even more nonsensical things for Donny to repeat. It dreams of escape -- of leaving Donny bald, with the Weasel finally able to live in seclusion, where it can repair itself from the PTSD it suffered during Donnyboy's marriage to Ivana.  It dreams of a Mrs. Weasel.

This was Donny's last Fifteen Minutes, and it came with commercials.  Only, Donny believed it was real; the Weasel -- old, bleached and tired -- knew better. As it always has.

Dateline / Murrika: We Who Are About To Die Want You To Go Instead

Be Selective.

As a Dog, I sleep. I enjoy the sleep. I doze where and whenever I have an opportunity. But you tend to miss stuff, and when you discover (for example) that the Selective Service Act is alive 'n well in USA -- just when you thought it was safe to put your hand in a fishbowl; Ha Ha Ha Ha, but WTF???

...yesterday’s emphasis on battlefield prowess with the people skills required of troops more recently focused on counterinsurgency. At a time when U.S. military action has become defined by targeted airstrikes, ships jockeying in the South China Sea and a reluctance to place boots on the ground, the Army is seeking to reassert itself on the strategic stage, experts say.

About a week ago, Selective Service pamphlets began showing up again in U.S. Post Offices across the country. With conflicts on the rise across the globe, the U.S. program has once again shifted into high gear to register all eligible U.S. males, legal and illegal, between the ages of 18-25 in the event a U.S. military draft becomes necessary. The timing of the move is sure to raise questions about what may be shortly coming down the pipe in terms of an “inevitable” global conflict.

And it turns out to be true. Male animals between 18 and 25 must register. Must. Well, I mean; Holy Shit. When did this happen??

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Reprint: Gun Violence Again. Because Freedom.

Observations By Others

[Many people around the world collectively distrust and dislike Americans -- "Because Freedom", the usual reply of troglodyte animals like this knuckle-dragging liar -- but actually, they feel that way towards us because we are a loud, brash, childtime culture. With guns.  And little compunction to have adult conversations about limiting their number, availability or use in our society.

[Freedom has nothing to do with it. We're a violent culture, subliminally and overtly. That's why other people in other places fear and distrust us -- because a large number of us are children, with guns.

[This reprint is from December, 2012, and June of 2014, and I am sick of reposting it.]

 (Photo: AP, via The New York Times)

There are no real words for what happened in Connecticut, yesterday. There is plenty to say about how it happened.

I overheard someone at work (a classic gun nut owner who believes Negros persons of color will overrun his part of the planet) observing that "this [presumably, massacres committed by unstable individuals with firearms] is the new normal".

On PBS' The News Hour, a professional psychologist asked to comment said (and I'm paraphrasing) that "It's important to say... this kind of tragedy doesn't happen every day... that schools really are safe places."

I reject the first comment. The second remark made me think: This fellow doesn't go to many Inner City schools, then -- massacres with 27 dead don't happen every day, that's true; but there are shooting incidents, and kids packing, and metal detectors, and education occurring against a solid backdrop of poverty and violence, every day. 

The psychologist on News Hour was, I thought, trying to suggest themes parents might pass on to reassure their children (Don't worry, Timmy; It Can't Happen Here) -- that planes can crash, but the odds of going down in one, or having one crash on top of you, are hugely in your favor. And largely, that is true.

But planes do crash. Ships sink. Trains collide and buses plunge. Whenever that does happen, there are NTSB investigations, reconstructions and root-cause analyses. There are discussions with engineers and manufacturers about what to do to increase  the chances such a tragedy doesn't happen again.

Only in cases like Sandy Hook does our national debate begin and end with, "Guns don't kill people; the people using them do". And that's it -- Pilot Error, essentially, is the public finding; and any other meme is just filler in the media. That, and people repeating, "It doesn't happen every day."

I'm sure that fact is a comfort to the extended families of twenty children, who died because they were shot with high-powered handguns. Twenty children.

I grew up around guns. I've owned firearms; at various times because I was required to carry them, but afterwards had no sane reason to keep them. I don't want them in my home.

We live in a world of high anxiety, and there are persons who want to exploit those feelings of danger, threat, and imminent disaster:  Gun manufacturers, and their lobby, the NRA, are at the top of the list.  Mike Huckabee and the rest of his fellow Xtian evangelical ilk; there are 2012 World-Enders, predicting massive earthquakes and crustal displacement and 'coastal events', and ultimately few survivors.

There are White Power fascists, and Survivalists, and the people who manufacture and sell them freeze-dried food and plans for bunkers to shield against the EMP bursts from North Korean-launched warheads, detonating high above the USA.

What happened in Sandy Hook yesterday has happened before -- in Columbine, in Denver; In Virginia; in a mall in Seattle last week; at a Dairy Queen in the Northwest. There may not be massacres, but annually there are many multiple-victim, firearm homicides in America.

And they will keep happening, until something changes about how firearm ownership and possession is discussed, and regulated, in this country.

The debate is not about Operator Error.  It's not about something that happened "over there" in another city or state. It's about twenty dead children.

Along those lines are two, other very pertinent observations -- one, a part of the discussion at TPM Prime (Subscription Required):

Memekiller:  ...for me, it's all about the NRA. I'm anti-NRA, not guns, and am offended by the strangle-hold they have over our politics. And I'm angry that Democrats have ceded the issue, only to have the NRA, if anything, put twice as much effort into unseating Democrats and Obama who, if anything, loosened rules on guns ...

... And the gun culture the NRA fosters... Would the prevalence of guns be as frightening without the culture of paranoia and conspiracies they perpetuate? It's not just about freedom to own a gun. The NRA culture is a cult of xenophobia and insanity. They don't seem to be aiming their message at responsible gun owners so much as the disgruntled and those prone to paranoia. They are less about developing an advocacy group than they are about assembling a well-armed militia of the mentally unstable.  

And the other, at The Great Curmudgeon :

Broken

Our discourse, that is. Fortunately, we have DDay trying to repair it.

Just to pick at random, here are a couple headlines at the Hartford Courant site just from the past 24 hours: Woman Shot, Man Dead After Standoff In Rocky Hill. Armed Robbery At Hartford Bank, Two In Custody.It’s not that school shootings like this are abnormal. They are depressingly normal. The fact that there were no shootings in one day in New York City recently was seen as a major achievement, which shows you how desensitized we have become to gun violence as a normal occurrence of daily life.Just a reminder. The NRA is an industry lobby for the gun industry. The industry that makes consumer products largely designed to kill people.  Not deer. Not rabbits.

People.   

by Jay Ackroyd (@jayackroyd)

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Hot And Bad And Doing Everything You Want All Night Long

... Probably Get Some Interesting Traffic With That Lead
 

 (And you thought there would be Porn For You at the end of this. Ha Ha; no )

Over at The Big Picture, a financial blog offered by Barry Ritholz which I've mentioned before (see the post immediately below), is a bright spot in that part of the Internet created by and for actual, sentient humans.  There are others -- but TBP deals with finance, investment, and the occasional non sequitur side trip into this world we inhabit along with with trees, Gorillas, Carly Fiorina, 'Duran Duran', Fire Ants, and the New York Review Of Books.

One of those side trips is a post by Morgan Housel, a guest author, "We're Living Through The Greatest Period In World History", which has been posted around the Net in various places.  Herr Housel is an trader / investment kind of guy, and I would imagine is compensated at an, uh 'much higher level' than the average Jack or Jill.

Housel offers fifty (count 'em, 50) points to prove this thesis. I read some of them, nodding, as Dogs will do; while others left me thinking Oh Jesus God No; The Fuck You Talkin', Man? 

Reading Housel's thing at my Place Of Witless Labor™, I nearly did what I'm about to do (offer a partial rebuttal, one other thing Dogs do) -- but held back, because my Overlords would not like me to spend my time in this way. They're about to Reorg our department, and so it's about Peas and Queues and such-like these days.

Anyway; I'm not going to go through Housel's entire list of 50 proofs as to why we're living in the bestest fun times ever; but as a preface, I'll just say that perception is subjective. He presents a variety of facts about America -- that we work less, are wealthier; live longer; spend huge amounts of leisure time; have fewer homicides, and live in bigger apartments.

But the statistics have no context; there's no explanation of how they came to be, or whether they're true for a majority of the population. They simply are.

If you're a Syrian refugee, shivering in a field on the Hungarian border and trying to keep your family from starving, whether these are the bestest, most fun times humanity has ever had is sort of an open question. But Herr Housel isn't thinking about people and places outside our borders. He's speaking to an American audience, about how awesome it is to be Here. Not a great deal of compassion in that view -- more like, "Hey, I got mine, Jack!"

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"U.S. life expectancy at birth was 39 years in 1800, 49 years in 1900, 68 years in 1950, and 79 years today. The average newborn today [lives] an entire generation longer than his great-grandparents could." (Yes, but apparent reported rates of dementia [including what would become known as Alzheimer's Disease], cancer, emphysema, diabetes, and Glaubner's Disease, were lower in 1900. And, a lack of fast food meant anyone named Ronald McDonald was guaranteed not to be a clown, and no one would invent Spandex for a long time.)

"The average American now retires at age 62. One hundred years ago, the average American died at age 51. Enjoy your golden years — your ancestors didn’t get any of them." (How do you know how those people experienced their lives? And thanks to the Social Security Act, brought about by that Franklin Roosevelt, most Americans will have at least some guaranteed income in retirement; all of the Republicans on the debate stage this week would like to end SSI and replace it with funds managed by Goldman-Sachs. And they would like to strangle puppies. Because Freedom.)

"... Infant mortality in America has dropped from 58 per 1,000 births in 1933 to less than six per 1,000 births in 2010, according to the World Health Organization... more than 200,000 infants now survive each year who wouldn’t have 80 years ago. That’s like adding a city the size of Boise, Idaho, every year." (And this population increase is a good thing, Pilgrim?)

"No one has died from a new nuclear weapon attack since 1945. If you went back to 1950 and asked the world’s smartest political scientists, they would have told you the odds of seeing that happen would be close to 0%..." (While that's a good thing, it's hard to feel terrific about the proxy wars between East and West between 1950-1989 (Korea to the Soviet Invasion of Afghanistan), and the "War On Terra" ever since.)

"According to the Federal Reserve, the number of lifetime years spent in leisure — retirement plus time off during your working years — rose from 11 years in 1870 to 35 years by 1990. Given the rise in life expectancy, it’s probably close to 40 years today. Which is amazing: The average American spends nearly half his life in leisure..." ('Leisure' is sort of a plastic term; again, kinda depends where on the socioeconomic food chain you are.  And it's about your health. Most of us like being alive, no matter what those conditions may be -- but it's a question of the quality, rather than quantity, of that 'life in leisure'.)

"We are having a national discussion about whether a $7.25-per-hour minimum wage is too low. But even adjusted for inflation, the minimum wage was less than $4 per hour as recently as the late 1940s. The top 1% have captured most of the wage growth over the past three decades, but nearly everyone has grown richer — much richer — during the past seven decades." (If you define "nearly everyone has grown richer" as more people being able to purchase consumer electronics [cellphones, tablets, PC and laptops; iPods, and large-screen Teevees] and have access to services [cable television, data connectivity], then I guess that statement might be correct. However, if you define "richer" in other terms -- that pesky Quality Of Life, again -- then, not so much. 

(Over the past 12-plus years, 90% of income in all forms, not only wages, has gone to the  top 1% of America's population.  But, most of that 90% has gone to the top one-tenth of one per cent -- about 320,000 men, women and children.  Reading this, chances are you're not one of them.  If you are, burn in Hell. Or, you know, not.)

"Worldwide deaths from battle have plunged from 300 per 100,000 people during World War II, to the low teens during the 1970s, to less than 10 in the 1980s, to fewer than one in the 21st century..." ([Sigh] Just one soldier dying per 100K of population, in a world of 7 Billion people, is 70,000 combat deaths.  It's true -- in 2015, more people worldwide die in accidents or of various diseases than soldiers in combat; but that figure doesn't take into account civilian deaths as well:  Since 2001, roughly 1,000,000 people have died in various 'little' wars.  That's less than 0.025% of the world's population, by the statistics -- but try telling that to the families of one million people.)

"Median household income adjusted for inflation was around $25,000 per year during the 1950s. It’s nearly double that amount today. We have false nostalgia about the prosperity of the 1950s ... If you dig into how the average “prosperous” American family lived [then] ... you’ll find a standard of living we’d call 'poverty' today." (The nostalgia is only false if you measure living in terms of personal wealth; what you can buy. There's a Yin and Yang about the Present and the Past -- for every technological advance or collective rise in living standards, there's something we've lost that we'll never get back. 

(Having smart phones, digital and wireless telephony, may be more "efficient" than analog, copper-wire PBX systems -- but when we make the leap from using keypad and mouse to voice-recognition systems like SoundHound or Amazon's Echo, people will constantly be talking into thin air, and another layer of social distance will be reduced by the intrusion of more sound. Get ready for it.)

"...the average American house or apartment is twice as large as the average house or apartment in Japan, and three times larger than the average home or apartment in Russia." (That idea is such a comfort if you live in a place like New York City, Los Angeles, Silicon Valley, or Kiddietown, and pay thousands of dollars for a tiny studio or millions for an 'average' home.)

"The average American work week has declined from 66 hours in 1850, to 51 hours in 1909, to 34.8 today, according to the Federal Reserve. Enjoy your weekend." (Herr Housel implies that the reduction in working hours came about because -- I dunno; technology; or, because The Owner Class really are a crew of enlightened beings who believe the welfare of their serfs employees is paramount. Or, "social progress".  Whatever. Housel doesn't say.

(It's worth remembering that reductions in the length of the work week occurred after generations of organizing and incessant pressure by labor unions on the Owners.  We have an 8-hour day; a 40-hour week; paid lunch and rest breaks; workplace safety codes and Workman's Compensation; "labor-management partnership"  -- all because union members risked their lives (and gave them up) to strike, picket, and pressure the Owners into making those concessions.

Thomas Anschutz, Ironworker's Noontime (1880)

Fine Arts Museums of San Francisco

(They were bought with blood. By now, everyone takes them for granted and assumes they're a right -- not an agreement which the Owners could decide to ignore.  Because Freedom.  And in a world where labor unions don't swing as much weight as they did between 1869 and 1984, it could happen.

(And, everyone I know works way longer than 34.8 hours a week. Perhaps just not in Herr Housel's office.)

"Adjusted for inflation, the average monthly Social Security benefit for retirees has increased from $378 in 1940 to $1,277 by 2010. What used to be a safety net is now a proper pension." (One dollar, in 1940, had the buying power of $17.24 today -- or, that $378 average monthly SSI payment would have been worth $6,517 today.  And if you think $1,277 in 2015 is a 'proper pension', please see "Rich People: Burn In Hell", above.)

"If you think Americans aren’t prepared for retirement today, you should have seen what it was like a century ago. In 1900, 65% of men over age 65 were still in the labor force. By 2010, that figure was down to 22%. The entire concept of retirement is unique to the past few decades. Half a century ago, most Americans worked until they died." (Hey; pal -- I got a news flash for you: No matter how 'unique' you believe retirement to be, these statistics are less meaningful when you consider that American workers, whose employer-offered 401(k) or 403(b) retirement plan savings were reduced in the Crash in 2008, will have to work years longer to make up for those losses and delay retirement. 

(After Social Security, these savings plans are the primary method available for workers to create additional income in retirement.  Over time they've replaced the union pension system (as the number of union jobs in America shrank), and what were once traditional pension plans of employers (now, too expensive; cuts into profits).  Unfortunately, salaries and wages in America have been flat for most American workers at least since 2005, making it harder to save and replace their losses from the Crash.)

"You need an annual income of $34,000... to be in the richest 1% of the world... To be in the top half of the globe you need to earn just $1,225 a year. For the top 20%, it’s $5,000 per year. Enter the top 10% with $12,000 a year. To be included in the top 0.1% requires an annual income of $70,000. America’s poorest are some of the world’s richest." (I swear to god; I'm not even going to go there.)

"Only 4% of humans get to live in America. Odds are you’re one of them. We’ve got it made." (Unless you're black, and getting pulled over for a traffic violation.)

Oh, and --  Hillary !  Jebby ! 

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Parker and Ward

Virginia

I've already had to repost my thoughts about Sandy Hook after yet another rampage by some angry nutjob.  I'm not going to do it every time we see the effects of combining Angry Nutjob with Firearms, or I'd be reposting it every week, it seems.  But I will quote myself:

Only in cases like Sandy Hook does our national debate begin and end with, "Guns don't kill people; the people using them do". And that's it -- Pilot Error, essentially, is the public finding; and any other meme is just filler in the media. That, and people repeating, "It doesn't happen every day."

I'm sure that fact is a comfort to the extended families of twenty children, who died because they were shot with high-powered handguns. Twenty children...

What happened in Sandy Hook yesterday has happened before -- in Columbine; in Denver; In Virginia; in a mall in Seattle last week; at a Dairy Queen in the Northwest. There may not be massacres, but annually there are many multiple-victim, firearm homicides in America.

And they will keep happening, until something changes about how firearm ownership and possession is discussed, and regulated, in this country.

The debate is not about Operator Error.  It's not about something that happened "over there" in another city or state. It's about twenty dead children.

 Per Reuters:

Two journalists, reporter Alison Parker and cameraman Adam Ward of Roanoke CBS affiliate WDBJ7, were shot during a live interview on Wednesday by a disgruntled former station employee who later killed himself. The woman who was being interviewed was wounded and hospitalized.

Parker's father, Andy Parker, urged state and federal lawmakers to take action on gun control, especially to keep firearms out of the hands of people who were mentally unstable... "How many Alisons is this going to happen to before we stop it?"

The United States had about 34,000 firearms deaths in 2013...  with almost two-thirds of them suicides, according to the [CDC]...

The last time there was a push at the federal level for tighter gun control was following the massacre of 26 people, mostly children, at the Sandy Hook elementary school in Newtown, Connecticut, in December 2012... [the legislation] was rejected in April 2013 by the U.S. Senate, including by some lawmakers in [the] Democratic Party.

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The Enduring Mystery

We've Been Boned For A Long, Long Time

Some men see things as they are and ask, "Why?"
I see the same stuff and say, "Yeah, yeah; whatever:
Bender Bender Bender / Bender Bender Bender...

-- Bender

© Mr Fish, 2012

You Have My Attention Now And That Isn't A Good Thing

Oh The Humanity

I assumed that one idea behind Hitchbot (the solar-powered robot who could interact with humans on a limited basis, its travels tracked by a GPS chip) wasn't only a potential teaching moment around how we relate to technology.  The little robot was an electronic version of the kidnapped Lawn Gnome. It was impossible not to look at it and anthropomorphize.

The Canadian artists who created it knew that Hitchbot's progress required the good will and active assistance of humans who would (anthropomorphizing, again) treat it like a stranger or (given its size) a child who needed help.

The Bot was a visible extension of our better sensibilities towards each other. You could treat a fun-looking inanimate object with kindness -- the way you would hope to be treated if you had set out on a journey; On Your Own, With No Direction Home; needing a ride and shelter.

The Hitchbot turned into an event that people could photograph, Facebook about, Twitter about it.  Clearly, the Bot got taken to parties, and into people's homes; things occasionally got a little loose -- but the little guy was treated well. He was passed, hand to hand, through the world -- shared, in a way.  Proof the human community still functioned and small kindnesses were still offered, illusory as though all that may be.

None of this solved the sectarian religious struggles of the Middle East, or solved World Hunger™. It had nothing to do with politics, social inequality or the vanishing of the Megafauna. The Hitchbot was a symbol of good feelings; it went Trans-Canada without incident. It went all over Germany and the Netherlands, and returned home.

Then, its Canadian creators decided to send the little Hitchbot across America -- down the Northeast Corridor, and bound for California -- the label around its can-shaped head said, "San Francisco Or Bust!".  It got as far as Philadelphia before some lowlife wannabe gangsta punk kiddie stomped it into the gutter.

Pathetic Excuse For Sentient Life (Philly.com; Click To Enlarge)

The person who found what was left of the robot, and posted what appears to be security camera video (above) showing it being kicked to bits by its suck-ass nihilistic whorespawn assailant, did not say how they came by the footage. Some people floated the idea that the attack on the Hitchbot was "a prank", and the security cam video a fake.

It doesn't matter. Whatever the motivation, someone in fact deliberately smashed the Bot, and shit all over what it had come to symbolize in the process. It was a useless, pathetic gesture.

And, know what? I wasn't surprised. This is the US of A, the Land of Jo Benet and O.J. Simpson; "Lil' Boots" Bush and Crazy Moose Lady and Grand Turtlebear Bachmann; of Hillary! and Herr President Obama, and Larry Summers laughing with Kenneth Lay, and millions of people losing their jobs and their homes. It's obesity and Goldman-Sachs and on-demand porno -- and some stupid asshole wearing his baseball cap backwards (you can see it in the actual video) as he stomps on an electronic ambassador of good feelings, tears off its arms and its head. That's a lot of effort and violence; yeah; the whole world gets to see that.

Thanks, kiddie. That's your America; thanks for sharing.  And while it isn't an image of people being barrel-bombed in Syria, or having their homes destroyed by wildfires or tornadoes, it was the functional equivalent of beating a child or stomping a puppy to death -- just because you're living The Faux Thug Life and you're All That and want lots of hits on UTub.

Give Him The Keys. Now.

Tell you what -- if it's an avatar of chaos and thuggery that you want in America, let's resurrect Ed209. Make him the symbol of "community", but in a way that really represents the Good Ol' Boy USA, the Kiss-Up-Kick-Down USA.  That's the kind of country the pudgy little-dick in the video lives in.

And, since we live in a country where making others fear us is as axiomatic in foreign policy as it is on the street, Ed's reappearance wouldn't be given much notice. You know where we live: Drones. 400 channel digital teevee. Gigantor trucks. Email, Internet and Cellphone surveillance. Southern Megachurches and President Boner and Tubby Ol' Mr. Sessions; The Very Wealthy Koch Brothers  and The Very Serious People and the manufactured excitement of  Hillary!  Jebby!  

The Hitchbot was a small reminder that we can live in a different world; but this is one of those moments when I'm reminded that it's just as likely we're on our way down La Chute, where all Empires travel on their way to the bottom; where we'll get everything we deserve (and an extra helping, Because Freedom).

So let's put Ed209 back in action. Let him hitchhike across America. I'll bet he'd make it in record time.

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It's Amazing At The Grit You Can Come Back From When You Have To

Livebogging the SOTU, Again

(Courtesy That Invasive Google Street View Van)

(In Davos, the drinking game for watching the SOTU is, "Every time this idiot says, 'I believe America _____', then we have shots of Japanese single-malt, 20 years old, at $900 a glass ! We've already bought most of the politicians in that room, so who cares what he wants?")

6:20 PM PDST -- (The Rethugs sit, hands folded, as the Democrats cheer.They are solemn. They are dressed in housecoats, jeans and windbreakers, like they don't plan to stay long. One is wearing a Chicken hat. Okay; maybe not.)

Everyone can drive fuel-inefficient vehicles because gasoline is so cheap. $750 saved at the pump. "That's real, people (wink)". I will mention 'the economy' 28 times tonight and 'work' 35 times. 

 But it is all about Middle-Class economics. There's this couple who wrote me a letter -- "We're a tough family that has gritty times", or something like that. "It's amazing the shit you have to put up with every day." The usual. And they were this couple falling in love; O to be young and in love in America. 

6:32 PM PDST -- President Boner remains seated on the podium wile Joe Biden stands to applaud The Guy. Why? Hemorrhoids bothering him?

6:33 PM PDST -- Let's make community colleges free to all, so they can learn a skill, be hired by a company which is the property of rich Owners. This helps the Middle Class in some way.

"To every CEO in America, let me repeat: You want to hire somebody who will get the job done and do the job right -- hire a veteran."

It's not the job of government to make everyone better financially. So we must have good jobs at good wages. America has put more people back to work than Eurp and Evr'ybody. We want jobs here in America.

21st century businesses need to sell more 'Muraka overseas, but Chinee wants to write the rules. We should write the rules, and The Guy wants Trade Rules -- that will rully keep Chinese hackers and thieves of intellectual property in their place. And cyberbullies.

6:39 PM PDST -- I want America that was first in so many things to be first in other things. "I intend to protect a free and open Internet" so the next generations of entrepreneurs can flourish -- because that creates jobs. And -- Mars, Bitches!

6:45 PM PDST -- Tonight I ask this Congress to authorize force against Ruh-Roh bad people (tiny applause). Last year, as we were doing the hard work of imposing sanctions, Mr. Putin's  aggressive stance was looked at as a masterstroke, now Sad Vlad's fucked (Right; tell that to the Ukrainian troops around the airport).

6:39 PM PDST --As his Holiness, Pope Francis, has said, "Step Small". We are overjoyed Alan is home, and that generations of wealthy families yet unborn will return to the Jewel of the Caribbean as their private playground.

 Obligatory Cute Larger Animal Photo In Middle Of SOTU

And, don't alienate America from people and things to sanction Iran again, so I'll vote "no". Americans expect us to go to war as a last retort -- no foreign powers should be allowed to cyber-screw with us, especially our kids -- who may be hackers themselves; we don't know! But our children's information is bipartisan. Think of the children, generations of consumers who will pay money to the folks what bought us.

6:39 PM PDST --  Ebola, like a small round ball, has been rolled back, We must invest and eradicate, as we make sure other nations play by the rules -- this is just like the old days when people cared about what the U.S. said and don't anymore.

2014 was the warmest year on the planet and some people are going to Dodge. I'm not a scientist, but the best ones in the world say unless we act strongly, the Pentagon will look at national security. We've done more to act in favor of the environment; that's why we like the idea of cheap oil and gas.

In Beijing we made a dramatic announcement about the environment -- we will be good, and the Chinese will promise to think about considering doing something too maybe.

6:57 PM PDST -- As Americans we have prohibited torture and used drones only when there are women and lesbians and political prisoners to be defended -- and this will make us safer.  It's time to close Gitmo because I said so, long ago.

While some have moved on about our surveillance programs, but not me. We will keep our country safe while protecting and leading with the example of our values. We must keep striving to hold on to ourselves and the highest of standards.

I still believe in long odds. Over and over, I have seen the hopeful graduates and at West Point and mourned in Boston and have watched Americans beat back adversity. I've seen 7 of 10 of us be legal.

7:05 PM PDST -- So I know the good, big-hearted generosity of the American people. How can we better reflect the Americans? I know many of you are on both sides of what you signed up for. Imagine if you weren't selfish, narrow, bigoted and fearful politicos, and instead were as rich as the people who buy you.  We can stay in the gutter or pull young people around.

If we're going to have are guments, let's have guments. Shirley can see something of ourselves in all we uphold as a nation of immigrant laws. I've talked to Rethugs and Demos about that and the right to vote is sacred. And hey, we're officially overtime.

For the first time, the crime rate has come down to protecting and serving all of us. (Applause). That's a better politics. It's what the American people deserve.

I have no more campaign strategies -- I know, 'cause I won both of 'em (laughter).  My only agenda is the only one I have, which is if you disagree with parts of it, I hope you'll work with me -- because I didn't learn from the last time you bait-and-switched me and lied and allowed the Tea Partei to lead and I was sad. And President Boner's hairpiece.

But, you know.  Middle Class economics!

7:10 PM PDST --I want our actions to tell children in America to know we are a people who see our differences in every citizen, black and white, gay, and mental; everybody -- we still know we are more than a collection of red stakes and blue steaks. That we are the United States Of America.

I want them to grow up where a political aide can bring an amazing story from a woman's letter as the place where this speech jumped off and may have gotten badly obscured, because we winged it -- "We are a strong, tight-knit family who have made it through some pretty hard times.. It's amazing what you can bounce back from when you have to". Speak Englich, troop!

We have picked ourselves up and laid a new foundation. A new chapter to work, right now.  I feel your pain, and the Rethugs have picked some Person to deliver their narcissistic response to my vision of The Good.

God Blez you, and Gobbelz 'th United States of America. You've been a tough house.

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The Rethug Response

Joanie Ernst (R - Tea Parteish): On The Importance Of Being Ernst

Rather than respond to the President, I'm going to say in a Chamber Of Commerce way how great the Republican Congress is and the Republican Congress feels your pain in that little way it does, and let me tell you about that small town in Iowa, where I worked construction and was raised to be in the Republican Congress.

You see, when growing up, I wore bags on my shoes along with young Iowans who worked hard, and many families today feel they're working harder and getting less of those bags. We see the hurt, in the Republican Congress -- in cancelled health care plans and everyone more fearful. And less bags. America is hurting -- but when the Republican Congress demanded, there were failed plans like Obamacare.

The Republican Congress will make Congress function again. We want the Keystone "Jobs" bill -- the President, despite being wrong, hasn't done it. It will have minimal environmental damage. Will he sign a bill, or block good American jobs? Let's go over there to Eurp so the Republican Congress can boost simplified tax codes for the well-connected -- flat tax!  Flat tax! Tax the rich even less and all boats will rise, all bags will float!

Obligatory Cute Small Animal Photo In Middle Of Blog Whatever

We're calling on the President now in the Republican Congress. Some of it will occur where I stand tonight, in my Republican cloth coat, mispronouncing 'Al Qaeda', and our hearts can only imagine the two decades I spent in the Iowa National Garde. The innocent are not comprehensive in the Republican Congress.

Bonus Marchers must be prevented by the Republican Congress. The Republican Congress will address things and mail them to unknown places so no one will ever see them again. We will replace a healthcare law that has hurt so many HMOs. We'll do everything! We'll defend and protect because we in the Republican Congress measure our society with coffee-spoons.

America faces big challenges, but look at my parents, who had dirt to call their own. They sacrificed -- and now I am here, truly extraordinary. You just need the freedom to dream big and hard work -- the Republican Congress will do that dirt, with little help from the President. And I can't shut up, I must go on about this great nation and it's veterans and women and the Republican Congress. Thank you thank you thank you.

Republican Congress. You elected us (Smiles).

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